Everyone thinks I spoil my kids?

I have 3 children (Twin boys (13) a daughter (12. They each have nice things like, tv's in their rooms, iphones, ipods, nice clothes, xbox games, jewelry, etc. People think that we just spoil them because they have hardly any chores (other than cleaning their rooms and occasionally helping out with dishes and things) However, they really work their nice belongings. All of them are on multiple sports teams, they are very respectful and they're straight A students. When they come home with report cards that are filled with A's, I feel that they deserve something. Whether it's a new phone, money to go out with friends, a new outift. Is it fair to make their number their number one priority school and then reward them for it? I don't know why people find this to be a problem.

Your doing nothing wrong its just treating your kids and look where its got them so far

Well, its nice to give a small incentive, but that's not how the real world works. Give then chores and make them want for things like new phones and games.

Chores have a point -- to teach your children how to take care of a household so that when they move out on their own, they can function like self-sufficient adults.

It's great that your kids are successful in school, but I would be concerned that by giving them so many nice things and virtually no household responsibilities, that you're setting your children up to be living at home with you until they're well into their 20s. Or longer. They may get used to a certain standard of living (as well as having all their meals prepared, laundry washed, bills paid), and not want to give that up. Obviously at 12 and 13 they're too young to have big responsibilities like after-school jobs, but at the very least they can learn how to do their own laundry and make themselves a sandwich.

A indicator that your kids are spoiled is do they get angry, throw tantrums, or complain a lot when they don't get some of the things they want? From your description, it does seem you're a bit generous with the gifts. Getting straight As for one semester report card doesn't really afford them to have a new phone. Also, if you're constantly rewarding kids too many gifts it will make them feel like excelling in school is not an expectation but rather something to be rewarded about. This may also cause them to have less concern or care for material possessions. Give rewards but not tremendous rewards.

I don't know if getting good grades in school but not helping out around the house really deserves expensive things. Personally, I worked hard in school when I was growing up PLUS I was expected to help out with cleaning around the house and I didn't get expensive gifts for it. No TV in my room, no cell phone till I was in high school (and it was for convenience, not just to indulge me), and no expensive clothes. I think I had it good.

I don't think that your children are spoiled. They are good kids.
but you should only give them gifts when they get good grades or do something that deserves a reward.
and its good that the.y have chores it helps them bcome independent and how to take care of stuff

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