IPhone frozen when trying to update and won't connect to iTunes?

So I tired updating my phone using a software update on my iPhone 4S and I agreed to the terms and conditions and it went to a black screen with a white charger port and an ITunes symbol indicating to connect it to iTunes.

So I went to connect my iPhone 4S to my ITunes on my laptop and it connect to my laptop to import my photos but it wouldn't connect to iTunes.

so all in all I can't connect my phone to my iTunes or come off the connect to ITunes.

I've tired re-installing ITunes, holding down the home and lock button

Recovery Mode Loop. This is a common problem and the most effective way to sort it is to reset the iphone. Sorry. (This is why android is better!)