Can't add music to iPhone from new computer?

My old computer suddenly died and I lost everything on it. Bought a new computer and installed iTunes, but the thing won't let me manually add new music or put anything on to my new computer. I check 'manage manually,' but when I click apply it says it's going to delete everything on my phone. I DON'T want to do this! I have nothing on my new computer and I can't add anything because my entire collection is on my phone and iTunes won't let me transfer anything to my computer. What am I supposed to do? My old computer is dead and I can't pull anything off it, and I don't want to lose thousands of songs.

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