My relationship is almost ruined, and I think I've ruined someone elses? - 1

I will have been with my boyfriend 1 year next month. We've been through alot together and I love him with all my heart. Not long after we got together, I suspected something was up so while he was in the shower I went through his old phone that he uses alot but I didn't know what for. There were no messages sent back but a few from his ex. They were together on and off 4 years. She'd say stuff like she misses him. I confronted him and he said she does still text him now and then but he never replies. She cheated on him so many times and hurt him so much. He thinks I'll do the same because in his eyes "all girls are the same" because one girl hurt him.

Anyway, that was it. Then 4/5 months into our relationship he came up my house early hours in the morning really drunk just after having a night out clubbing. He carries his iPhone and his old phone around with him everywhere. Not anymore but he used to. I went through it again and noticed he had sent a text to her that same night saying something like "Everytime I think of you I wish I didn't exist". I went mad the next morning.

Last month, she messaged him on Facebook saying "Why were you outside my house last night"? I asked him, again angry and he said he wasn't and said she's using excuses to make him reply. I let that one go. Not long after this I went onto his facebook through his phone without him knowing and in his deleted one was a message from her "I just want to say I'm sorry for everything I've ever done to hurt you". He hid this from me. He talked his way out of that. Now yesterday she tried it again! I'm FURIOUS. If I knew this would happen trouble with his ex I would never of got with him. He says I need to ignore her because he doesn't reply. Anyway I don't know her personally but have found a few things out about her. And I know she has a boyfriend.

So tonight in my anger I added her boyfriend who she's been with him 5 months and he messaged me saying "Do I know you?" I said no but I've seen him around. He asked where and I said the area that she lives in. And he said he can't accept me because he has a Mrs. In anger my reply was "You have a Mrs? Well tell your Mrs to stop contacting my man on Facebook all the time!"
He asked what do I mean and tried adding me. Now I regret it. If he goes back and tells her, she contacts my boyfriend again he will know it's me because he knows I'm angry over this and suspicious as to what the hells going on between them.
Should I tell him what I've done or do I have every right to do this? Please give me advice

You don't say how old you are but you are acting very immature. Not only that you are being a dishonest controlling snoop. Do this guy a favor and forget about him. Hit the reset button on your emotions and move on.

Your relationship was ruined the minute you decided you couldn't trust him and started snooping in his phones and facebook. You trust the man or you don't. If you don't, move on. No amount of stalking his ex girlfriend or her boyfriend is going to make a difference.

I understand your anger 100%. I would be furious as well and would probably want to beat the girl. Though the idea to message her boyfriend was what the girl deserved but not your boyfriend. If i was you i would confess everything to your boyfriend and apologize, also say it was the heat of the moment. If you guys make it through all that i suggest you make him block her that way she is out of both of your lives. Hope this helped -Melissa