Why are my parents so strict and overprotective?
I'm 15 years old and I'm half white half Hispanic. I'm adopted by Indian parents and they are very mean, strict, and overprotective. My mom has a horrible personality and she always yells. Like when I would ask her "did you finish all the food, or is there still some left" she'd kind of yell instead of responding calmly like "NO! I Didn't finish it! Unless YOU ate it!" So that makes me mad and I always have to be like "ok, ok I'm just asking". Both my parents won't get me a phone till I'm 18 and they won't let me have any social media. I joke by saying "I'm going to save my money up for an iPhone" because I know they get annoyed by it and they'd be like "no iPhone, you're not getting that. Think of something else." and even if I do get a phone, they'll put all kinds of family monitoring apps and make sure I can't use it pass 10. I'm more mature than they think, but I don't know how to prove it to them. I'm home-schooled and I have been fore the past 3 years because I got bad grades in middle school. They won't put me back in school because they still think I'm immature and I won't do my work. I try talking to my mom about it, but she won't listen. I have a laptop, but it's only for work and they put Qustodio (family monitor to see what your child is doing) on it and even with that on, every time I have to do work on it, I have to do it in front of her with the screen facing her because she still doesn't trust me. There's much more to say, but I can't. I don't know what to do.
Your life's a mess lol
Here are some general suggestions I make to younger teens in case you might get some helpful ideas from them. Ask to have a serious discussion with your parents about how they see things panning out in the coming months and years. It needs to be fairly rational, so if one of you becomes too emotional (e.g. Angry) it would be best to time out and try again another time. Prepare in advance what you would like to say and ask: write a plan, even.
As you reach each birthday, for example, or each new school year, what rights, freedoms and responsibilities will you have? Chores, pocket money, curfews, dating, etc. Will all come into it, obviously. You can't really expect something for nothing, so think about what you can put into the family and household as part of your negotiations as to what you can get.
If you are to grow into a responsible adult, it must be a gradual process: if they keep you wrapped up in cotton wool and then suddenly let you out of the box at eighteen, you won't have enough experience to know how to handle it.
That said, your parent(s) is/are responsible for your safety and welfare during this time: no doubt they love you and they themselves have the experiences you don't yet. Seeing things on t.v. And hearing your friends' (exaggerated?) stories aren't quite the same.
If they don't want to do this, ask them if they will please consider a plan and talk again in a week or so. All plans need to be a little flexible, as unexpected things can happen, of course.
Hopefully this will show that you have a maturing attitude to your family and your life.
Cause they enjoy being that way, not much you can do but move out when youre 18
- Why don't American parents teach their kids the values of hard work and personal responsibility anymore? Instead it's "Here's a cookie, now shut up" or "Oh honey you don't have to participate in any activities if you don't want to, we'll just put you on Prozac and let you watch Netflix all day, oh and here's a new iPhone."
- What should I do should I get a new phone or not be embarrassed? And how do I convince my parents to get me a new phone? I have an iPhone 4 and it is 2017. The iPhone 7 already came out and I jane a 4. I feel really embarrassed when I take out my phone that I don't take it out because my friends have the iPhone 6 and 7.
- Uhh my parents bought me a new iPhone but it's not the model I want.Why do they hate me such much? Uhh my parents bought me a new iPhone but it's not the model I want. Why do they hate me such much?
- I'm on my parents phone plan through sprint and I want to get off it and buy my own. How much does it cost if I get a single line? I want to get off the old iPhone 7 and go to the iPhone 11 but I'm not sure how much it costs to go a single line let alone if they offer Single line unlimited data.