Coahuila Mexico: Dangerous or safe?

My family always use to go to Mexico for a week or two in the summer, but ever since 2009 we stopped. We sometimes go, but to Piedras Negras. See, my dad also gets paranoid a lot(he has Bipolar or Schizophrenia can't remember), and he doesn't want his truck to get taken away or us getting hurt. There have been times like in Reynosa, when my uncles brother has been stopped on the way to Reynosa, and the narcos were taunting him saying they were gonna take his son. They didn't, but they stole all their stuff. Or when in my moms home town, someone's daughter was kidnapped and then killed, and they found some guy with his fingers in his mouth.

We're going to Sabinas for a week and I'm really nervous. Should I take my iPhone? Should I wear my Ralph Lauren clothes, or just dress as if I'm sort of poor or just a local? Some people from church go to Allende every weekend, in their very new Dodge, and nothing ever happens to them, which I wonder why. I don't think my family is involved in anything, but still, stuff does not only happen to people involved in it. They kidnap people and stuff! I mean I LOVE Mexico, I just don't like the violence. We were once followed by this brand new Ram truck in Piedras Negras for like 3 minutes, and I was so nervous. You could tell they weren't normal people, and who would drive a truck like that? SURELY NOT AN AVERAGE CITIZEN! But at the same time, my uncles daughters have said they go out at night with their friends and nothing happens

Added (1). I wanna feel normal, but I also have some mental issues, like anxiety and OCD. I think of very morbid stuff that could happen. And they are there. I was once in Mexico and me and my mom were going to "el centro", and some truck zoomed by all the others and my mom told my gramps why that truck was going so fast, and he said "son unos de ellos". Something like that. Ugh, I wish I could just go wherever I wanted and not worry, but I'm' always on the lookout when I go.

Added (2). Like seeing what kind of people are around, what type of cars and to see if they're brand new pick up trucks or SUVs, see if they have Mexican or American license plates, or none at all. Nothing has happened to my family. My family in Mexico just mind their own business and work. What I'm worried a little about is my grandpa, since he drinks a lot and goes out with his friends at night

I had a former renter (cantinera) who was from Torreon, Coahuila; but here in the US for about 20 years. The situation looks pretty bleak from the official US government post. I do have two other questions answered with opinions from other avatars listed below for you to review.