My ex blocked my number, what should I do?

I normally wouldn't do something like this, but i'm confused and need guidance.
We met on a dating site, 3 months ago, so not that long, i've been in longer relationships but this seemed more intense, he was smitten from day one & I remember telling my mum I'd marry him. I was like a schoolgirl. He took my virginity.
things were going well, I'd been going through such a hard time as a year ago, my dad passed and I developed severe hypochondria as a result and was plagued with anxiety symptoms feeling as tho life was over. So this new relationship was totally intense for me, things were finally going right for me in one department, i found ''mr perfect'' and he was.
I was very happy, he treat me better than anyone i've ever been with, it was very fairy tale like.

Because I get so overwhelmed and felt a bit insecure, and not used to relationships, I casually 'ended it, saying ''our differences are becoming apparent'' . Pretty unstable and stupid I know. My anxiety symptoms were coming back full force and perhaps I just wasn't ready?
He ended up agreeing and we were civil about things, he said he wants to be friends and that if I ever need help with anything or get bored, then call him. I agreed with this.
But later on I was kind of disappointed by the casualness and I know I couldn't just be friends,
he asked me if I was going to go find a new relationship, I said ''god no, why would I? Are you?''
He said once he got his shiz together he would.
That was it, I said ''I can't be friends, it seems silly maybe its better we don't talk for a bit''
No response.

That was over a week ago now, I regret what I've done so much as I know I'll never find anyone like him again, I know there's plenty of fish in the sea in the future but i feel none of them will compare, I've not emotionally moved on and don't know how I can, I don't even want to as I keep having this stupid hope we'll get back together.

I sent one drunk text saying I miss him mid week, no response. I was gutted.
Last night I got really drunk again and went ott this time pouring my heart out. No response, I was shocked.
I rang and rang, and it did that thing where it rung once and says 'the line is busy' which means you're blocked on iphones, to confirm, i rang him on a withheld number on a different phone, he picked up right away. Wow.

It hurts so much that he just immediately just left my life, moved on and never looked back. I found it strange but also heartbreaking. I checked his dating profile (which he deactivated when we met) and it is back up, I'd feel sick even doing something like this so it hurts he can move on quickly.

I still can't get over the pathetic hope that we'll get back together, even though I know at the back of
my mind it couldnt even happen now. Phones were our only contact, We live in the same small town but have no mutual friends, no facebooks, just phones really.

Just confused on how to react to the whole situation, it all happened so fast and I feel it wasn't ended properly and I had no closure but I've just been erased. I have a feeling he won't be back, but I'm clinging on hope and don't know how to stop.
This hurts so bad and I feel like an idiot and like I'm getting bad again

You have closure, he wanted sex, you gave him sex, he has now moved on, to save yourself a load of grief you have to stop trying to contact him, leave him alone, after 3 months its crazy to think you can love someone enough to marry them, he won't be back, accept that and move on.