Should I feel guilty for having this relationship with my mother or accept that it happened and move on?
My mother raised me along with my two sisters. She as very stressed and so was I. This caused our relationship to be very toxic. We argued everyday, literally. It's so wrong and sad to have this mindset, but I disliked everything about her. I Never said I love you. Ever.
I worked in high school and ignored the fact that my mom was poor. Most adults can support their children financially, but she couldn't. I looked down on her for this. She worked off and on. She would end up quitting because of other employees. Bought myself a car, fast food all the time, always had an IPhone, all things she couldn't afford. I never bought her anything. On her last birthday I got her nothing. This was because of how bad our relationship was. We needed to be separated. The arguments weren't started by me, at least by how I remember it. She doesn't get along with much of the rest of her family, has a low amount of friends because she argues with a lot of other people too.
After moving out for good (I'm a sophomore in college with an apartment. Dorms last year so I had to live with her in the summer)I have improved myself a lot. For the passed 3 months I ignored her as much as I could so I could step back and think about our problems. Now I'm thinking that I was wrong for not helping her and being a better son. I feel like I was holding her back. But the relationship was also holding me back. I have had to do a lot of thinking to get to where I'm. I also am where I'm from working hard.
Just do whatever feels right to you.
Try not to be angry with your mother, but move on and live a life independent of reliance on her. It was hard for me to look back and see my mother's mistakes in raising me, and I'm still pissed about it, but I never put her down for what she did, just ignored how I was treated. Don't do anything you may feel guilty for in the future.
Helping her now would only enable her. You have the right idea. Avoid talking to her.
Maybe you should tell her you want to fix your relationship with her
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