Why do I have these restless/anxious episodes? (symptoms listed)?

Sometimes I will get a restless feeling out of no where. It hits hard and lasts for hours.

When i get it:
- I can't focus on one thing for more than a few minutes. For example, in the past 10 minutes, for no particular reason i searched "parakeet training" "jenna marbles" "feral children" and "yahoo answers" all of which i payed attention for only a few minutes before going on to the next thing.
- Nothing fulfills me during these episodes. I can have the tv on, while on my laptop, while looking at my iphone, while petting my dog, while eating something, and still feel unfulfilled.
- I get a mental block from doing my responsibilities.
- I do this thing i call "anxiety texting" where i just text anyone and everyone random things because I feel the need to talk to someone to distract myself from my anxiety. But then I feel like i'm annoying people and my anxiety worsens.
- My jaw gets tense and my teeth feel sore the morning after. I also blink less and my eyes get dry.
- My heart pumps faster.
- I pee more often during these episodes. It's like everything in my body is speeding up.

Does anyone have an instant remedy for this? ANY suggestion helps.

I'm dead serious when i say Start smoking weed ("medical cannabis") and you'll see a difference

Sounds like akathisia, something common as a side effect for antipsychotic medications, antidepressants, and antihistamines, among other things. Klonopin can combat this effect but you would need to talk to a doctor.