Wife can't seem to be able to plan anything without her daughter?

Wife can't seem to be able to plan anything without her daughter?

Added (1). My 18 year old step=daughter has to be invited to everything. If she can'y go on a weekend, then the wife makes it that no one go. The only time my wife ever makes a planned weekend is when her daughter is working. My wife can't seem to leave her daughter at home and plan trips with me, her husband. We never had a honeymoon because she felt bad for leaving her daughter at her mom', making her feel like she missed out.

Added (2). I want so bad to take a vacation alone to get away from them. They are both like chewing gum now. I can't separate the two, BUT of course, her daughter doesn't hesitate to go to places alone with her friends.

Added (3). We haven't been on vacation for three years because the daughter's schedule. This year, after school ended, the daughter left for two weeks with friends to hangout with no thought to the parents. Parents who? Yet, mom will still worship the ground she walks on.

As a mom its difficult to leave your children behind, even when they are 18
you know you won't have many more years, if any where they still want to go on vacation with you etc
soon the daughter will have a life at college or a place of her own and not want to be away with mom
hang on in there

Maybe they're enjoying life.

Of course, she is her baby. She will always be more priority than u. Evenn when she is 50 and if you re still alive by that time she still be the first priority. Then her child, means your wife's grandchild, then you. I know, it sucks. And then you die.

Hopefully now that the child is a legal adult she'll be moving on with her life (college, career, relationships of her own, etc). Your wife's behavior does seem excessive though. I know PLENTY of people who are parents who don't include their child/ren in everything they do.

If for some reason, the situation doesn't improve (if the girl doesn't go off to college or get on with her life) you may need to have a marriage counselor help explain to your wife why it's important for a couple to have time without the kids around (especially grown kids).

Get some marriage counseling explain to your wife that you need time alone as a couple. Your wife sounds like she is living her life through her daughter. She needs to let her daughter go a bit. This was sicken to read honestly a bit sad. I have a friend who's mother is like this with her daughter except worse. My friend is 26 & can't go out on a date alone, never had a boyfriend, no first kiss nothing. Ever place she has worked has been with her mom. Her mom made her get a job through her cousin so she could watch her. She still has a bank account with her mom. She can't go on vacation on her own and still asks her mom if she can hang out with her friends. Whenever we hung out her mom calls asks what everyone doing. I had to stop hanging out with her it's was to sickening. Her daughter still now does nothing for herself has no experience because of her mom. It's like she's crippling her own daughter in a way.

Is she harming you? No Then let her enjoy what she is doing