How to make this simple iPhone app?

I want to make a really simple iPhone app just for myself. I just want it to have a big red button in the middle and when you press it, it plays an mp3 clip of some guy saying "HA, GAY!" I want to use it when someone i hate is talking. Any idea how to do this? PS. I have a mac computer.

If you want to make an OS X app, you first start is to use Xcode:
https://developer.apple.com/...com/xcode/

learn how to use it, you can use Youtube tutorials, or you can learn from this site tutorials:
http://maniacdev.com/