Husband's impulsive spending
My husband just bought a $200 used and broken robot toy and another $74 robot toy on the same day using his credit card. He's been buying stuff like clothes, sneakers, iPhone, gadgets, whatever stuff he doesn't really need. Who knows what else he bought since he's been hiding these from me. He wants to eat out a lot, and buys things not on budget. We're supposed to save up for future plans but we can't move forward. I can't do it by myself and pay for everything. We talked about this before, that we need to save up, but it seems like it didn't really sink in him. How would I deal with his impulsive spending? TIA.
Sit down and go through exactly where all your money is going. He may not realize how much he's spending. Set a monthly budget of exactly how much the two of you will spend and how it will be spent. I would eliminate a few of your unnecessary credit cards and I wouldn't let him have free access to one. Start writing down exactly how much you spend and when. Set saving goals so he feels like he has something to work toward. Vague goals are easy to avoid. You may also want to meet with a financial adviser to help you better manage the money.
Make him return these things. The emphasis should really be on saving. Most people these days aren't good at saving money.
Stop paying the credit card bills for him, the idiot.
You married an immature toddler. Either get used to always having to worry about finances, or get divorced and find an adult partner.
He may have issues he's not dealing with and uses spending as a way to help him - so see if you can talk him into having a chat with someone. But having a hobby and an interest is not a bad thing - its only if it gets out of control.
Well, since you are in it together… Budget in SOME impulsive spending for him. Build him a slush fund… Not an enormous one impossible to afford, but a slush fund for him to spend as he wishes on impulsive spending with the understanding that when that monthly fund is depleted. It's gone, no replenishing until next month. That way, if he has a huge thing he wants to buy. He can save up for it himself.
You can't do it yourself. And you shouldn't have to. And HE shouldn't have to live with the budget YOU decide the household should adhere to. Because he gets his equal say. And he feels differently than you do. Which means that you are not "right' and he is not "wrong". Doesn't work that way. Compromise is essential. You can move forward… But only with a compromise that fits BOTH of you.
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