My iTunes doesn't recognise my iPhone?

When i plug my iphone into the computer, the battery charges however the iphone button doesn't appear at the top of itunes. Neither does the box that asks you if you want to upload photos from the iphone. However when i plug in the ipad, it immediatley recognises it.
I have the latest addition of itunes
The usb ports are fine
The connecting wire works
I have restarted my computer
I have turned my iphone on and off

Any ideas how I can get my iphone recognised my itunes without having to go to the apple support people?

Go to apple. It may be defective

Hold power and home button while hooked up to your pc, itunes will recognize it in 7-12 seconds

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