So lately I've been more self-conscious about my appearance/body than ever before. I've always looked awkward in pictures (especially on picture day at school), but I never let that get to me until now. Each day for the past three or four months I've taken at least an hour out of my day after school to stare at myself in the mirror, pointing out all the faults I can find in myself.
I guess I never realized how mirrors work, how your reflection is really just a flipped image, so it's not how you really appear to others around you. Thanks to having three mirrors, I can face them towards me and stand in between to create the true mirrored reflection of myself.
Due to having relied on the flipped mirrored reflection for so long, I seem to have managed to mess up my posture, and my shoulder blades look awkwardly uneven (one is higher than the other). I had no idea that I've been standing tilted to my right. It doesn't feel out of place, but when I see myself in a true mirror or picture/video, I'm so embarrassed. It's like one half of my body is heavier than the other. Nobody else around me looks like this!
So, aside from constantly staring at myself in the mirror, I've begun to take pictures of and record myself with my iPhone. I can't help but want to hurt myself after doing so, I look so awkward. Almost everything about how I look is just out of place, it's frustrating. I can't even move my hair around in the mirror anymore without having to create a true mirror.
Added (1). People tell me that EVERYONE feels insecure/self-conscious about themselves, but I personally think that's bull. I don't know anyone that constantly looks at their reflection when at school except for me.
I also should have said that I'm a bit fat. Luckily I'm the tallest kid in my school, so I look a lot less than what I really am (about 225 lbs), at least when compared to others who are the same weight